and i am holding my breath because
i hope you will find me a second time
and we will walk like foxes
through the fields and urban slum
we will walk and i will tell you
exactly why i'm still standing
here watching you like you were
the greatest sight on earth and
your eyes are my human being
the window panes were watching
but we swore we were alone
they were watching and we
were cursing the ice under
our feet but we kept on
going forward forever until we
could remember the trellises of
the ice castles
I drew the ice castle when
I was five and was sitting at the
picnic table out back where
you were stung by bees and
our yellow labrador yelped
it scared me how she cried
and I cried and stubbed my toe
our yellow labrador came with us
to our new home and we built her
a new house and put insulation
in the walls
we put it in the walls and hoped
she would stay warm
but she always seemed desperate
to share our life indoors
when you last took the trip
across the lake you forgot
to bring your camera and when
we crossed the river we found
the duck hunting lodge where
I could look out and see to
the other side of the river
i took your picture from
the slit in the wall
meant for shooting ducks
i took your picture while you
held up the sledgehammer
an orphaned sledgehammer waited
across the river for me to stand up
and pace my way across as i lost
years and fragility
as i lost my child eye and i
crossed the river i wanted only
to have a taste of the side that
for so long i could never reach
our footprints revealed our location
but i'm not walking in sand and
we are not walking in snow so how
will you find me if there are
no footprints and you can't remember
where you left me
i am leaving soon and you
are headed towards the rest
but i don't know
where you will be and i want to
remember you like you were last night
we have been standing like the
bravest men on the front lines
even though i'm a woman
i am the woman and i am slowly
learning that i always was
and i am the butterfly
how much of a woman has been released
and celebrated as we find new depths
to our celebrated life and
how will I ever find you across the lake
if there are no footprints to follow
i'm not walking in sand
and we are not walking in snow
so how will you ever
find me
i'll always leave you verses
to follow
http://browse.deviantart.com/photography/?order=24#order=9&q=frozen+river
